I’m migrating this story over from an old non-exclusive blog. I almost didn’t find it – but I’d like it saved for “posterity,” or at least as long as this blog exists. Originally posted in 2014.
How I Met My Husband:
Okay, let’s not panic. This isn’t going to be a post that gets dragged out over nine years that gets diluted to the point of losing its audience… etc. (haha dated HIMYM joke)
I’ve made comments on twitter about the interesting way I met my husband, and I even went into detail with @MaiseyYates and @mel_thegreat (Amazing authors and wonderful tweeps) – but telling this story in 140 character bursts doesn’t really do it justice.
The story actually begins a looooong time ago, but let’s start when I actually met the man himself.
In the early 1990s, we had mutual friends that owned a comic shop. You’re gonna roll your eyes, I just know it – but the name of the store was “Destiny Comics”. Yeah yeah, I know – it’s trite, but you might understand why it means something to us by the end of this post.
We’d been acquaintances for a while, seeing each other when we were hanging out in the back of the shop, trading cards, reading comics, doing generally nerdy stuff. There were a lot of conversations that went on back there too, and me – being female – well, I got dragged into a lot of interesting question and answer sessions. Remember, this was 1991 or thereabouts, girls were still rather novel in the geek scene.
One day, one of my least favorite dudes was spouting off about how chicks (yes, chicks. Not women, ladies, or anything even remotely respectful) could never match his level of “intellect” as far as comic knowledge was concerned. In fact, he’d propose to the first woman who could name the founding members of the Justice League. Har Har… (the laughter rang out between him and his minions at that point).
I turned my chair towards him and said, “Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Flash, Green Lantern, Aquaman, and Martian Manhunter. On the off-chance you want to get detailed, Hal Jordan was Green Lantern at the time, Barry Allen was Flash, and J’onn J’onzz was Martian Manhunter’s ‘real’ name. And by the way, no thanks.” At that point, he called me a few really un-nice names, but my side of the table was laughing so hard they were either crying or peeing their pants. We kinda hated that guy.
A few minutes later, the man who would, in a few years vow to love me for better & worse, yadda yadda… came over to me and whispered in my ear, “Y’know, you and I are going to have sex”. To which I replied – not in a whisper, but also not loud enough to be overheard, “Fuck off, asshole”.
This is when we became more than acquaintances, this is when we became mortal enemies. We were both into Collectible Card Games at the time (Magic the Gathering (link to a WaPo article about us) and Star Trek: The Next Generation). I had some REALLY great ST:TNG cards, and they were some that he needed. I’d do shitty things like refuse to trade with him, trade with other people right in front of him, stuff like that. Mind you, we were both adults. I was in the work force – I had a really great job at MCI doing graphic arts for their executive branch. But yeah, I was super childish when it came to the nerd stuff after work.
So let me shorten this part up a little – we got a bit closer when our mutual friends started doing things outside the store. Essentially, we got lives. We went to parties, weddings, picnics, y’know, normal things that normal people do. We grudgingly got to know each other a little better, and while chit-chatting, we realized a few things about each other.
*warning – get ready for some weirdness*
We found out that his father and my brother worked at the same Unical plant in Los Angeles for quite some time, so when we visited my brother, we were mere feet away from his family at any given time.
Then we got another piece of info. On one of our trips to Walt Disney World, we stayed at a lovely hotel not too far from the resort. It was notable because it had a courtyard that held special activities that were distinctive to that particular hotel. By that time, he had moved across the country – you guessed it – to Florida, and was working at – drum roll… THAT HOTEL. We compared time frames, and most likely he worked there while we were visiting.
His next move was to the Northern Virginia area (where we eventually met). However, a few years before actually running into each other and speaking, I frequented a bar with friends and unfortunately, usually turned down guys when they asked me to dance. Pre-hubby and I were talking about bad dating experiences and of course this subject came up. Guess where he got shot down when asking women to dance? Yup – that bar. The years I went there. And we knew because it was when I was in college nearby.
There were a couple of other minor things that happened where we could’ve crossed paths, but they were so small, I’m not sure they warrant mentioning. But suffice it to say – I think those three are enough – yeah?
So when I say meeting at Destiny Comics actually means something to us, I don’t take those words lightly. After all of those coincidences, we started to build a friendship. Yeah, just friends. I hadn’t forgotten the day he whispered those horrendous words in my ear, and I even teased him about it a few times.
There was some flirting, and some winking, but never anything overt. In fact, we mostly bonded over the fact that I lived with my terrible sister. She’s really awful. Once she “took out the trash” because it was her turn. I found out that this meant she put it out on the deck. When I finally found it, we had maggots, so pre-hubs and I had to clean it up – and it led to a huge fight.
My sister is a whole different story, and I’m SO not going there, but when things went pear-shaped with her, pre-hubs and I decided we’d get a place together. He hated his roommates, and I needed to get away from my toxic sister, so we found a nice two bedroom townhouse and got the hell out of our separate dodges.
We really had a great time together. We shared the same interests, had the same group of friends, I mean – it was like we were a couple without being a couple. You know the story, right? Then it just happened. We’re watching some movie in the living area, hanging out, some weird thing is going on and there we’re right next to each other. And BAM – kissing. I mean what the fuck?
Here’s probably the most humbling part. I was literally thinking, “I can’t believe he was actually right. That we’re going to sleep together”. Then there was a LOT of sleeping together, and a lot of moving clothes into one bedroom, etc.
About a year later, on that very same couch in the living room, he put his arm around me. I can’t even remember what we were watching – TV, or a movie, or whatever, but he said to me, “I think it’s about time we get married”. Just like that. Matter of fact, all Alpha male – even though he’s not really Alpha most of the time.
I said yes and here we are. In October it will be 18 years. (UPDATE: in 2016 we hit 20 years married) Over 20 since we met. Sometimes it seems longer, and sometimes it seems like the time has flown by. But I honestly don’t know what I’d do without him.
So, there’s my story – hopefully told much better in long-form than on twitter.